Playgroup

Today, Cameron and Joshua and I were able to go to playgroup. If you know me you know how hard this was for me. I hate making new friends, I hate meeting new people. After we got home I was talking with my sister-in-law telling how well it went and how much fun Cameron had and how it was nice to be out with other women instead of stuck in the house...I mentioned how I laid in bed this morning trying to talk myself out of going....seriously! I really did lay there for well over 30 minutes trying to talk myself out of going to playgroup.

I don't know what it is about meeting new people. All of the ladies at play group are very nice, they all have young kids and they all go to church with me. It wasn't so much as meeting THEM...it is meeting new people in general....I think it brings out all of my insecurities. I'm really quiet until I get to know you. I am self conscious about my weight. Cole and I are still trying to get established here...it sounds crazy to ME when I'm asked why we moved and what kind of a job my husband has....we moved 3,000 miles so he could install security systems? Seriously!

Anyhow, playgroup went great....Cameron loved playing with the other boy his age there. It makes me so sad every day when he plays alone...in Oregon he had cousins to play with everyday! So it was good to see him take to this other boy and run through the backyard. I had fun chatting with the other moms....I didn't say much but that will come with time! Cameron is already looking forward to going back next week. J also enjoyed himself....he discovered grass and played with a baby doll.

Making friends takes time...I know, but I only have a couple more months before the state of Alaska is dark....I need friends by then!

Those that are important...

When I was cleaning house on Saturday, I was thinking about all of the people I am fortunate to have in my life. I know that I take for granted some of the people that mean the most to me so here's a shout out to you and them!

I guess I should start with family first....My Mom, sisters and step-dad. I know you have it rough. Times are a changing and we as individuals are going to be tested. I want you to know that I am rooting for you! I love you all sooooooo much....in fact more than you will ever know. There is always a small prayer in my heart for each of you. I want you all to find happiness, grab on hard and keep it! Mom, you have devoted 22 years to me and my sisters, Thank you! Thank you for being you and doing the best you could. Amanda, I know you are struggling, I feel it! Please know that I love you...no matter what! I just want you to find the mad of your dreams (mike counts....just make sure it's real!), I want you to accomplish your dreams and then get married and have lots of babies so I can be an Aunt! Emily, My dreams for you are the same as Amanda's....find him, accomplish it and then give me nieces and nephews!!! I love that you two are some of my closest friends. Robin, Keep working hard! I am proud of you for sticking up for and standing with mom. Thank you for all you have done for me!

Next, My step-mom, Jody. You see, I am pretty lucky to have her in my life. When I think of a step-mom, I think of the evil one in Cinderella. Jody is nothing like her. Jody loves with all she has. she is so sweet and works her butt off all the time. I love that she cares for me and my sisters and that she love Cameron too! I am glad that even though her and my dad are no longer together we are still able to talk and chat and be the friends that we are! She is my step-mom but she is also a great friend.

My dad is pretty special to me too! I'm not terribly close to him, but I do love him and I wish we were closer.

The Henderson clan...ie. Cole's sisters and parents and all of the significant others. They have been a huge addition to my family. I don't know where Cole and I would be with out them. They have been a huge support to me and the choices I've made and for that I am grateful.

Aspen. Aspen is my BFF. We have been friends since the 9th grade and when I say friend I don't say it lightly. We were inseparable, joined at the hip, not just friends but more like long-lost sister. Just like any other friends we have had our differences, we have taken different paths but for some reason they always lead back to each other. Aspen, You are my very best friend. You understand me better than my own husband (it must be a girl thing). I am so thankful for our friendship. Thank you for always being there for me. Kaitlin is another GREAT friend. We became very close my senior year in high school. She is the first one of my Mormon friends to have ever talked to me about the Book of Mormon. Thank you for that, Kaitlin. I attribute the person I am today to you too! You have been there when I needed a shoulder to cry on and when I needed a good laugh. I love that we have keep in touch even though you have lived five hours away for the last four years. Thank you for being you and for putting up with me.

Gramma Lindsay is a pretty special lady too! So so hard to find the right words for her. I know you read this sometimes....please know that if I could I would tell the whole wide world what a wonderful woman you are. You are so smart and talented. You are beautiful on the inside and out and I am sooooooo happy that Aspen is willing to share her gramma with me! I love you!!!!!

There are so many others. I have lots of friends and family that I love and cherish! To everyone else (including my devoted blog readers!!!!) : You've had a hand in who I am too! I love and cherish our friendships. Thank you for all that you do for me and my Family.

Last but not least is my Husband. Cole has been a part of my life for almost 6 years....can you believe it? I can't. We are coming up on our 3rd wedding anniversary. Thank you, Cole, for choosing to spend eternity with me. I love you more than you will know. I cherish all of our memories and I look forward to many, many, more.

I know this is long....but I felt inspired and need to to get these feelings off my chest. I feel like there are so many people struggling around me...if they only knew how important they are maybe it would make their day better or at the very least bring a smile to their face.