Yes, that's right....Cole ended up in the ER, again, last night. I ask my self when will this end? When will we be given a break? How is he supposed to function? How am I supposed to take care of him? and me? and Cameron? and Grandma?
I know the answer. I know the truth. And at moments I question. But. I know that Heavenly Father has a plan. I know that we and this are part of his plan. Each time Cole is made stronger and each time we as a couple are strengthened. I know that Cole will be made whole in the end and that one day he will be able to live without the pain and without the anxiety.
I am thankful today for a loving supportive family. My sisters came over with in minutes of receiving my phone call to help with grandma and to watch Cameron. My mom provides hugs which during these times I need, they aren't provided when Cole is feeling the way he has. I am thankful for my father-in-law who asked the question and gave me a release for a moment; who reminded me who was counting on me and who needed me. He also provides insight and helps me to carry on. I am thankful to the ER doctor and the PCU nurse; I was unnecessarily rude and I realize that today, although I still feel justified, they worked with Cole and provided the medication to calm my husband.
Wife, I am. Mother, I am. Advocate, I am. Care-giver, I am. Daughter of Heavenly Father, I am.
2 comments:
I hope everything is ok. I can't say I know what your going through but I do know how it feels to feel like "why us?" It was so hard to watch Clark go through all the pain and emotions of everything we wnt through. Not to mention what you go through as there care giver. Everytime I had the thought why us cross my mind I had to sit down and remember that heavenly father never gives us more than we can handle. Clark and I have become so strong through all of it and our love for each other is amazing because of it. We always say we would never want to go through it again but at the same time we would never want to take that experiance away. It has helped shape who we are today. If you ever need anything. Even just dinner let me know. We would be glad to help.
Wow, you poor thing, I love your last statement though, you are so powerful in your convictions and beliefs, I admire you. It was great seeing you (for a second) at conference! You (and Cole) are in my prayers! Sarah
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